USA Today –  Leonardo DiCaprio was the special guest at President Obama’s South by South Lawn summit in D.C. Monday, and shared an amusing detail during a speech by climate scientist Katharine Hayhoe.

Hayhoe, discussing climate change, said, “As long as we haven’t signed up for the trip to Mars. I don’t want to know if anyone has.”

To which DiCaprio joked, “I did.”

 

So this is it. Earth is officially doomed. Leo has been screaming to the sky to all of us for years about the Earth ending and global warming being a reality. Yet nobody listens to him, including myself. Listen Leo, you’re a beautiful man pumping models left and right coming out with straight hits in film. We never wanted you to tell us about science and it has finally caught up to us. Leo is jumping ship and joining Elon Musk on his trip to Mars. 

If Leo actually follows through with this then is there anything left for us peasants to look forward to here on Earth? To know that Leo has done everything Earth has to offer and is peacing out on the rest of us then I need to find myself a way to get on this ship. I can’t be stuck here with the rest of you scum earthlings and live a normal day-to-day life here. I need to be laughing it up in Leo’s entourage on Mars hittin it off with the Aliens. But we all know I’ll just be going to work everyday and drinking dollar drafts in a shitty bar in Fanueil Hall.

I’m officially listening Leo. Not about global warming, obviously. But I need to come to Mars. I am team leave-Earth. Let’s make this happen.

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